I didn't make a post last year, and it's not exactly three years right now (It will be on the 30th), but I wanted to make this post right now, before I forgot some of these thoughts.
I've been here for three years now, so I think it'd be pretty much wrong to say the Wiki hasn't been a huge part of my life. It's funny, over the years I've grown to both love and hate this place. I've seen it grow and change. I've seen users join and leave. I've gone from an anon who came here for some Zombies tips to an administrator and news team member that delivers information to 14,000 people on twitter and helps get information to the 2 million visitors we get weekly. I've met some of my best friends in the whole world through this site, and I've gained a type of experiences and interactions with people that I don't think many others get to have.
It hasn't been the smoothest journey, I can't think of a single person right now that I haven't bumped heads with at some point, or argued with, or talked about behind their back. In some ways the wiki can bring out the worst in people. Power struggles, name-calling, lack of empathy seem to be pretty common here. Not so common that it's a bad place, but it's almost like a high school. You know it goes on, no one really talks about it or wants to admit it, but you know it goes on.
But I'm not here to bag on the wiki. If I hated it, or the people, or the experience, I wouldn't be here writing this blog today. I love this place. It's been a huge part of my life, as I already said. A lot of you here have made me more of the man I am today, for better or for worse, and I thank you for it. I really do.
Even I admit though that I've become a little, I guess disenchanted with the Wiki though. When I first joined, I was excited to talk to people on chat or IRC, contribute to the forums, find news, edit in anyway I can, etc. Now it feels more like a job, and I just show up to fill my quota and to make sure people don't forget about me. And more often than not, this lack of real happiness when I come to the wiki now is part of the reason I've bumped heads so often with a lot of people.
And that's why I think my time might be coming to move on. This is the lowest activity year I've had since joining, and I've started going days at a time without so much as looking at Wiki Activity, a place that used to basically be my homepage. I know I've done this kind of sappy "this might be it" blog before, but I don't know. I've been reflecting on it lately and I feel like it actually may be coming soon. But this place has been so important I didn't want to just disappear one day without some kind of goodbye, so I guess you could call this the pre-emptive one.
I don't know that I want too yet. If you'd asked me a few years ago I would have told you I totally expected to be on the wiki chat telling everyone about how I just got married, just got a new job, just had a kid, whatever. But now I know it's coming, and I just couldn't disappear without saying these final thoughts about the place and the people here.
To my friends:
- KATANAGOD - You are one of my best friends in the entire world man. The things we've talked about, the old zombie games we used to play, how supportive you've been about my writing, it means the world too me man. I don't care how many times we've fought or argued, or whether you have anger problems or I'm self-absorbed sometimes. You are amazing and I hope you have an amazing life dude, you deserve it.
- N7 - You're another of my best friends dude. You're genuinely one of the funniest people I've met on the internet, and you've gotten me to laugh more often than not through just text on IRC, Chat, or Twitter. We gotta keep talking about Marvel man, even if I leave the wiki. Agents of Shield is getting to intense and Age of Ultron is looking so sick! If this is it, you have a good life too man, you deserve it just as much as Kat.
- Callofduty4 - We don't talk much anymore, but I hope you know you were without a doubt one of the most influential people in my time on the wiki. That night I got banned from chat and we talked in PM on IRC, that wasn't just a turning point for my Wiki life, that was a turning point for my life in general. You made me realize something about myself, about how much of a bully I could be, that I wouldn't have realized without that kind of honesty, and it's made me a better person. We've argued a lot also, there was one argument in my mind right now which was probably the most heated argument I've ever had on the wiki, at least in the top three. But that doesn't matter too me. You're a great person, and your kindness to everyone who joins the chat and just needs to talk is outstanding. Thanks for all the virtual hugs over the years (Though you seem to switch up the hug emote every time, I personally just use (hug)) and I hope that you as well have a great life ahead of you.
- Crazy sam10 - You've always been a friend Sam, and I'm sorry if our recent and consistent clashes of opinions and strong words have hurt you in anyway. I'm not going to claim to agree with everything you do on the wiki, or every decision you make, but I am genuinely sorry if I have, or still am, personally hurting you in any way. You're a great guy, and your dedication to the quality of the wiki has been impeccable. The Wiki wouldn't be what it is without you, and I hope you have a great life ahead of you as well.
- Diegox223 - I'm gonna be blunt here, cause I know you can take it haha, but when I first joined the wiki I thought you were an asshole man. I'm so glad I got to find out how untrue that was. You are one of my best friends here, and those late night zombie games with Drk, Kat, and your chilean miner connection will never be forgotten. Have a great life dude, hope you get out of that mine soon!
- Deathmanstratos - You're one of my newer friends but you've been influential nonetheless. You're a great guy dude, and I look forward to maybe coming back to the wiki, should I leave, just to talk about the new seasons of The Walking Dead. You have a great life bro.
- Sactage - You've been here since before I got here but I feel like we never really got to know each other. I like that we've started talking a bit more now, and great to hear you chose your college dude! Forgot to personally congratulate you on that. I can't say I'm as excited that you slaughtered URL and replaced her (Almost wrote him, please don't kill me) with a Wise Wolf, but I can deal. Hope the future's awesome dude!
- AntiScootaTwo - When you first joined under the name "The Antibrony" I totally had you pegged as a petty troll who I could basically bully around a bit until he left so I didn't have to deal with any problem he caused. You joining made me realize that not every new user is some temporary guy just here to start trouble. You've been a huge contributor to the wiki and to discussion, and I genuinely have enjoyed some of the discussions we've had. You, as well, should have a great future ahead of you.
- FireBird- - You are hands down one of the nicest people I had the pleasure of meeting on the wiki. You've been a great friend all these years, even though we aren't particularly close. You have an awesome life too man.
- Raven's Wing - I apologize for all the times I've argued with you over petty stuff in blog comments. You made a comment not long ago that you have a weird sense of humor that not many people get, so maybe I should just learn to laugh at the same things you do or just move along haha. Have a great life man.
- Magma-Man - You are literally my favorite person to debate a variety of topics with. I know our friendship is pretty much based off of one of us tweeting something, and then the other starting an argument, but I think it's awesome. Your smart, you make good points, and you aren't an over the top fanboy (Even if you own a PS4 :P). Plus you introduced me to the Nazi Zombie Plus wiki, and though I'm not there a lot, I really appreciated the time that I was. Call of Wikia III is gonna be beast man, can't wait to read it! See you on twitter, and have a great life as well dude.
- Madnessfan34537 - You're another close friend of mine here on the wiki, but I feel like we haven't talked much in a long time. You've always been a great friend bro, and I've always felt I could confide in you if I had too. You have an awesome life man, keep in touch.
- Conqueror of all Zombies - We don't talk much, and I apologize that your entry is relatively brief because of that, but I want you to know that your one of the reasons I stayed here. You commented on my Zombie Review blogs back when I was doing them, and you comforted me after my first rfa failed, which is something that at the time I honestly needed. Thank you man, keep being awesome!
- Argorrath - Keep being cool man. If I never told you how impressed I am by your dedication to the wiki, let that be now. Your dedication has been amazing, and it's honestly insipiring and probably one of the things that's kept me coming back as my activity has begun to falter. Again, have a great life dude. Keep doing stuff. And Thangs.
- MLGisNot4Me - I haven't talked to you much, mostly cause I've seen you a grand total of like 10 times on IRC and Chat combined, but I've considered you a friend the whole time I've been on the wiki. Thank you for being a friend, and for being so dedicated to the wiki. Have a great life dude. Also, why don't you talk to me about Agents of Shield!?! You leave that talk page message and never follow up D:
- Joe Copp - We've had our minor arguments about various minor things, but you're a great guy Joe. Don't go changing anytime soon, you have a great life and stay classy bro! See you on twitter ;)
- Cpl. Bohater - We haven't spoken in a long time, but you're another guy I've always considered a friend, even if we've had a pretty massive series of arguments, some that got pretty heated. You're a great guy dude, have an awesome life as well.
- Verantha - I can remember having some good times with you on chat. I apologize for not having anything deep or philosophical to say about you, but not at least thanking you for being a friend and wishing you well would be a crime. So thank you, and I hope you too have a great life.
- Phillycj - You used to make me laugh so hard on Xbox Live man. We haven't played together in a long time, but I'll always have those memories. Plus you're a potato. Have a good life bro, don't go changing! Not like Potatos change much anyway
- Qw3rty! - Despite the fact that I don't think we agree on a single thing, like at all, I still consider you a friend. You're a great guy dude, enjoy your life, I hope it's great!
- Kylet357 - I don't know you to well man, but don't be a stranger. Keep in touch over twitter and stuff, I'm always down to talk. Especially about Marvel! Have a great life man!
- DBD Abyss - You're a cool guy dude. Even if you talk about MLG all the time and I have no idea what's going on. Don't go changing dude, and of course, keep in touch. Have an awesome life!
- This Username Better Work - You've always been friendly too me, which I've always appreciated. We aren't particularly close, but that's not whats important. What's important is you're a great guy, and I hope the best for you man!
And since I'm not sure they'll see this blog, or they are just straight inactive, I'd also like to acknowledge and thank 1337 Spnkr, Redskin-26, DrkDragonz66, Carbonite 0, Metlman, Dizturn, Jar teh marksman, ParagonX7, Smilular, DarkMetroid567, Joseph Tan, Just a cone, SXe Fiend, Sp3ctr3 130 Ki11er, Azuris, Bovell, Chiafriend12, WHISKEY35, Smuff, AndImBatman, Poketape, Eltomo85, Delije Sever 1989, Doc.Richtofen, Capt. Carebear (Cinna Mom), Xd1358, Thumps4DaZomb, Awesomesauce 360, AugFC, TheUltimateH4M, and The Wikia Contributor.
Every single one of you made my time here a truly amazing and influential experience in one way or another. Thank you for an amazing three years! I hope I don't lose contact with all of you when I do eventually leave this place.
So this is my "goodbye". I'm not leaving yet, but in case I do this is how I wanted to go out. Saying goodbye to some of the greatest people in my life, and apologizing in the cases where I needed too. Thank You.